Feature Friday with Gma

Every grandma is different, and each one is special in her own way.  Today, I would like to introduce you to my Grandma Gray.  Since I can remember, she has signed every letter, every card and every gift: Gma.  I’ve always loved that.  In high school my nickname was bpark.  Patrick Tucker’s was ptuck.  Gma was totally ahead of all the “cool” kids. Full Name: Esther Pearl (Wood) Gray Born: November 28, 1926 in Stratford, Oklahoma. (When I asked if she was born at the hospital she laughed.)  She was born at home. What was it like growing up and being one of 12 children?

“Just always a house full, and mom had to cook big meals.  I had already moved away before the last of them were born. I was the second of 12. The oldest was 17 months when I was born. Everyone pretty much got along, but my sister that was older than me felt that because she was older she was the boss. I didn’t always think that was the way it ought to be.”

“I admired my father and liked to be where he was.  Since there were no older brothers, I was like my dad’s oldest son on the farm. I helped milk the cows, feed hogs, and work in the field.  Sometimes I would set to the field with a horse and a tool and do whatever I was sent to do.”

“When school was in season it was from 9 am to 4 pm. There were about 10-15 people in my class.  It was a country school and we lived 2.25 miles from school, so we had to walk to and from everyday (even in the rain and snow).”

When I think of my grandma the words “giving” and “hard worker” come to mind.  She always worked hard and she gave everything she had to whatever she did.  When I asked her what was her biggest accomplishment she told me that it was her ability to sew. 

“To make a man’s suit is a pretty good accomplishment.”

She made suits for both of her sons, her husband and her father.  In fact, she made the suits that both her father and her husband were buried in.  Grandma also made my mom’s wedding dress and a bride’s maid’s dress, a candle lighter’s dress and the flower girl’s dress for my mom’s wedding.  My mom added that she also upholstered furniture, like her couch and recliner, etc.  My favorite things she sewed were matching clothes for me and my dolls. Grandma also told me that she sewed for others too.

“We lived at Oil Center, which was about 10 or 11 miles from Ada (OK), and there were people that brought me sewing from Ada. I was a good seamstress.” (My mom told me that she remembers one person driving 25-30 miles.)

Another example of my grandma’s work ethic came in 1979 when she graduated from nursing school.

“I was a nurse for a few years and really enjoyed it. You feel like you are helping people. I look back on it now and I think that it really was an accomplishment.”

Grandma was also famous for her pies. 

“I always liked baking pies. We always made our own pie crust and then the fillings we baked too, using milk and eggs and flour or corn starch, whatever we had, and fruit or flavorings.”

My grandma was married twice.  Her first husband was Cleo Finch.  She told me that his family lived 3/4 of a mile from them and so for several years all the kids would get together and play and hang out.  She was 17 when he asked her to marry him before he had to go to war.  She agreed and they got married.  They never went on any formal dates before they got married, but she said that she had spent a lot of time with him over the years and “he was a nice kid”.  Two months after they got married he was called to war.  Two months after that he died in battle. 

“We had a rural mail carrier who knew about our situation. He got the wire from the military, so he came out to our house and told mom and me.  Then, we went to his mother’s house and told her. That was not easy.”

About a year after Cleo’s death Grandma met my Grandpa, Fred Gray.

“We went to the same church. I hadn’t been going there very long when he came up to mom’s house to see me. Then we started going out together.”

About a year after that they were married.  Grandpa had a son, David and then they had 3 more kids: Garry, Larry (who went to be with Jesus in 1978) and Carma, my mom.  When I asked my grandma about married life she said:

“We lived on a farm and there was always a lot to do. You just did what you had to do and helped your husband with whatever needed to be done.”

Advice about kids:

“Take them to church and Sunday school, help them with their school work, and treat them like other human beings.”

Thoughts on spiritual life:

“I was 10 years old when I first gave my heart to the lord and I’ve tried all my life to be a Christian, read the bible and pray, and just be an example for other people. That’s all I’ve done.”

Advice about cooking:

“Use fresh vegetables.” (Grandma and Grandpa had a large garden, and Grandma made amazing dishes from it.)

Thoughts on chocolate gravy (a staple on Gma’s breakfast table, and one of my favorite foods):

“Chocolate gravy is something my mom always did and she taught us that.”

About life then and now:

“Everyone is more educated and most women have a job.  Back when I was a girl hardly any women worked in the public. The biggest changes in roles of women were during and after WWII. Women started to see themselves differently, but not in the area where we lived. About the only women you saw working when I was a girl were in retail sales and of course the nurses and school teachers. Things have changed so much. The types of jobs women do now weren’t available then.”

Any other memories to share?

”The main thing was the way dad and mom taught us. Dad almost always prayed at night before we went to bed, and he read the Bible to us.  He was a deacon in the church when I was born and he remained a deacon until he died. My dad was a good kind of a man.”

I have a lot of fond memories from visiting my grandparents farm.  One of my favorites is that of chocolate gravy.  I’m going to ask permission to share the family secret.  If I can I will post the recipe in a later post. 
After spending time with Grandma collecting this information I wish that I had done the same with both my grandpas.  Please don’t ever take your grandparents for granted.  Get all the information you can from them while are still here with you.
Have a great weekend!