Just A Cruisin’

Jason and I recently went on a cruise with some extended family.  It was my first cruise.  There were pros and cons that I will share with you so that you can make an informed decision on whether or not you would ever like to partake in this particular adventure yourself.  I’ll also let you know what I learned so that if you decide to go you will have some tips stored in your back pocket. 

Everyone asks, “Did you have a good time?”  I give a drawn out “well” with my head tilted to the right and a higher voice than normal, and then I answer, “Yes, for the most part, we had a good time.”  Will I ever do it again?  “Well (same high voice and head tilt), we’ll see.” 

I think it all starts with expectations.  Cruise liners do themselves a huge disservice by playing their commercials in December and January.  You see fun, you see swimsuits, you see sunglasses, you see shorts and tank tops and icy drinks.  It makes you think, “Hey, it’s freezing here.  Let’s go on a cruise to thaw out.”  Wrong.  Maybe there are places you can go to thaw out in January, but a Gulf Coast cruise is not one of them.  It was cold and windy.  We were stuck inside the entire time because it was too cold to go outside.  We missed out on all the views because it was too cold to sit by the doors or windows.  It was ridiculous.  

Another myth is that cruises are luxurious.  Not this one.  (We were on the Carnival Ecstasy ship.  It was a five day Gulf of Mexico cruise.)  The rooms were like campers.  The walls were thin and made of plastic.  The bathroom floor was rubber.  The shower curtain was that plastic that seems just a bit too small for the opening and you can’t pull it all the way closed because if you pull it forward then it’s open in the back and if you pull it back then it’s open in the front.  Annoying.  However, I will say the water gets really hot (yay) and the water pressure was amazing (double yay).  Another draw back was that the toilet only flushed sometimes.  It was like a port-a-potty.  You push the button the wall and it sucks it into the holding tank right under your feet.  You and the holding tank are only separated by a piece of blue rubber.  (Actually, I’m not sure if that is true or not, but it is a port-a-potty.) There are only two outlets in your room, one in the bathroom, attached to the light, and one in the main part of your room

It’s also quite dark on board.  The rooms and hallways had enough light, but walking around felt like when it’s daytime but all the lights are off in your house.  There were lots of windows, but it was cloudy for most of our trips and it didn’t seem like they had any lights in the big open parts of the ship.  They only relied on sunlight. 

I did enjoy dinner.  We had a group of eight, and every night we would meet at dinner and talk about our day.  We had assigned tables and the same wait staff every night.  So, by the end of the trip they knew us and we knew them.  The formal night was fun.  Jason and I went all out.  

Each night there was about 10 minutes of entertainment during dinner.  Fun music would play and everyone twirled their napkins above their heads to start the fun.

 

We had the early dinner.  If I ever cruise again I will either choose the late dinner or the anytime dinner.  The reason for this is because our days were built around having to be ready for dinner by 6:00 PM.  Since you dress nice for dinner that meant we had to be in our room by 4:15 PM, or so, in order for there to be time for me to shower, dry my hair and do the whole deal.  Also, I think we would have been able to eat more food if we’d had a later dinner.  We generally ate lunch around noon.  We weren’t ever hungry for a snack by 4:00, when we had to head for the room, but we were starving by 6:00.  If we had had the later dinner, we could have snacked between 4:00 and 5:00, and then been hungry again by dinner. 

Another thing about the early dinner is that it’s too early to get a fun night started.  Waiting 3 hours for the evening to start really makes you want to go to bed by 10:00 PM.  I think if we had had the later dinner we would have stayed out later and enjoyed more of the night scene.  As it was we would go to the casino, or play games with family from about 7:30 PM to 10:00 PM, and it would feel really late so we would all just head to our rooms and go to bed.  I’m sure this is about about as big of a preference thing as anything on the ship.

Another disappointment:  People go on cruises because they are cheap.  This is a myth.  I guess you can try to make it as cheap as possible, but the only thing I know for sure about Carnival Cruise line is that they want your money.  $50 gratuity (per person) is already added to your bill.  It costs $10 per bingo card to play BINGO.  The main form of entertainment on the ship is to give your money to the casino, the bar or the shops.  Oh, and don’t forget the excursions.  It’s like a money hole.  Oh, and they ask you tip your concierge at the end of the trip.  So, in the end, you feel like you still need to tip.  The total cost of the trip for both of us was $1,907.  The cost of the cruise  was $857.00 up front.  Our bill was $650.00 (including the $100.00 up front for gratuity, Jason’s $110.00 poker tournaments, our excursion to Chichen Itza was $142.00 for both of us, $20 for me to play BINGO, $10 for two lottery tickets, $70 for two sets of walkie-talkies, $13 because I forgot shampoo and conditioner,  about $100 for drinks, which I can count on both hands for both us total, and about $100 for other small random things.  We spent $400 in cash at the casino, on the excursions and buying stuff on the main land, gas and food for the drive there and the drive home.  So, we could have made it cheaper, but for what we did pay, we would have preferred an all-inclusive in Mexico. 

One thing that was fun is that every night they had backgrounds set up all over the boat.  There are tons of photo ops.  The only drawback is that the pictures are about $10 per photo to buy. 

The worst part of the ENTIRE trip is that I lost my camera.  It was a Christmas present from Jason.  It had all the pictures on it from the entire cruise, as I was dubbed “official photographer” for our group.  So, my first piece of advice is lug your laptop and save your pictures to your computer every night before you go to bed.

Other advice:

1.  You are allowed one bottle of wine per person.  Even if they guy carrying your luggage says it’s okay to check the wine, don’t.  It’s not okay.

2.  Take walkie-talkies with you if you are in a group, but bring lots of batteries.  They are hard to keep charged.

3.  Take a power strip to plug into your one outlet.

4.  If you go in the winter don’t pack more than one set of summer clothes.  You won’t need them.  In fact, take warm clothes.

5.  Don’t over pack.  It’s not worth it.  Take one outfit for each day and something to wear to dinner.  You can probably get away with two pairs of slacks and a shirt for each day.  When you check the weather before you go realize that it will be quite a bit cooler on the water and it will be windy. 

6.  Bring hats.  When the wind is bad, so is your hair.

7.  Take as many non-alcoholic beverages as you think you will drink.  They said the limit was 15 per person, but no one checks.  You can take cups of ice from the buffet dining room to your room, or you can bring your water or soda to the dining places. 

If I think of more tips I’ll update the post, but this is all I can think of for now. 

Over all I did have a great time with my family.  I enjoyed the boat, and it was nice to be away from society for a while.  It was remote, and it felt remote.  I liked that.  I think my problem with the cruise is that I expected it to be warm and it was cold.  I expected it to be a cheap vacation and it wasn’t.  I thought it would be luxurious, and it wasn’t.  So, the only problem I had were my expectations verses the reality I met. 

If I cruise again I will go when the weather is so hot that it will be hard not jump overboard into the cool water.  I’ll spend more money up front and hopefully have a more luxurious boat.  If I cruise again I will know better what to expect. 

I don’t regret going.  It was a great time with my family.  Here is a peak at some of fun we had, thanks to my mom’s camera.