Where I Belong

You know how baseball players have theme songs that are played as they are going to bat?  Well, I’ve always thought about what my song would be. 

There was a time when “Born to Fly” by Sarah Evans was my theme song.  The song was released in October of 2000.  I was a senior in high school.  I was ready to fly.  For five years I loved life, but I was still always waiting to fly.

That song played over and over in my car until after I graduated from college and another took its place. 

2005 is what I call “the dark year”.  When I think back to 2005 all I see is darkness.  I can’t remember much of that year, but in January 2006 I started coming out of the darkness.  I was bruised, but not broken.  I didn’t have much self-esteem left, but I did have enough to land a dream job for a 24 year old.  However, the boss had it in for me.  I was hired to do one thing, but expected to do another.  I never met expectations.  Every single day I arrived at work with a pit in my stomach and everyday I left that way.  At the time I owned a Rascal Flatts CD (Me and My Gang, released in April 2006).  All day long I would play this song over and over quietly on the computer in my office.  I also played it in my car on the way to and from work everyday.  It was my theme song for the short 4 months that I worked there, but it was more than that.  I was singing for the year of darkness I was coming out of, as well as the office of darkness I was facing everyday. 

When I finally quit that job I was free.  I soon started dating Jason seriously.  Although life is still hard sometimes, there has been nothing but light since the Fall of 2006.  I haven’t really had a theme song since then.  I’ve had several that have spoken to me, and that I have loved (they are under the “Songs That Speak to Me” tab), but none that have truly spoken to the core of who I am.  That was until this song came out.  I’m sure many people feel the same way I do, but this song resonates with who I have always been.  In fact, in high school my best friend, Mindy, would always get really mad at me because I constantly talked about how I couldn’t wait to die.  I wasn’t suicidal.  I was a happy, care-free teenager who loved life, but I knew that Heaven was my real home, and I couldn’t wait to get there.  This song by Building 429 sums up my entire life.  It is the one true theme song that envelopes all the other theme songs I’ve ever clung to.  This song speaks to who I am now, who I have always been, and who I will always be.

Sometimes it feels like I'm watching from the outside
Sometimes it feels like I'm breathing but am I alive
I will keep searching for answers that aren't here to find

All I know is I'm not home yet
This is not where I belong
Take this world and give me Jesus
This is not where I belong

So when the walls come falling down on me
And when I'm lost in the current of a raging sea
I have this blessed assurance holding me.

All I know is I'm not home yet
This is not where I belong

Take this world and give me Jesus
This is not where I belong

When the earth shakes I wanna be found in You
When the lights fade I wanna be found in You

All I know is I'm not home yet
This is not where I belong
Take this world and give me Jesus
This is not where I belong

All I know is I'm not home yet
This is not where I belong
Take this world and give me Jesus
This is not where I belong

Where I belong, where I belong
Where I belong, where I belong

Find More lyrics at www.sweetslyrics.com

A funny thing, I just went through my list of “Songs That Speak to Me” and I found this post - “Blessings”.  In the post I talk about how I rolled out of bed thanking God that this is not my home.  It’s always fun to find proof to the truth you speak about yourself.  =)